Unexplained desires
by colourmyworld1
Summary: Just a Stefan/Elena moment, basically their first time but not everything goes smoothly when you're dating a vampire!


IT'S THE FIRST FANFICTION I'VE WRITTEN SO IT'S SHORT AND PROBABLY NOT GREAT BUT ANY ADVICE WOULD BE MUCH APPRECIATED!

Then as swiftly as we'd got into the situation it was over, he almost seemed to fly out of the bed. Leaving me there on my own, not sure what had happened to change this oh so perfect moment. He turned away from me, like he was ashamed, like he couldn't stand to have me look at him. I was confused, I had no idea why he was acting this way, I knew everything about him, what could he now have to hide. Now I knew this, could he really have anything more he felt he couldn't tell me. That made me think, was it me?, was it something I'd done, or maybe _hadn't_ done, that was probably more likely. I moved closer to him, reached out, but before I could touch him he moved, he moved like lightening and in a split second he was a foot away from me. I couldn't help but gasp, I guess I still wasn't used to what he was capable of. He spun round to face me, the look on his face like he'd been stabbed, the pain in his eyes like he wanted to scream.

"I'm sorry, did I scare you?" he edged nearer to me, then stopped himself before he was too close, as if I'd run a mile if I felt him too close to me. I looked up and into his perfect sparkling green eyes, the sadness was umbearable to continue witnessing.

"No, of course not, it just shocked me that's all, Stefan ... what's wrong, was it me? I mean I guess I'm not the most experienced person...". It was that look, that same distressed looked that burned through my chest, and I knew that I wasn't enough, how could I be?

"Oh Elena, how could you think that, you were, you _are_ perfect, it's me, I couldn't help myself". He moved to the other side of the room leaving me kneeling on the bed by myself when all I wanted was him to take me in his arms and tell me everything was ok, that he loved me. But something about his slumped shoulders made me realise that wasn't what was on his mind.

"I don't understand, what do you mean help yourself, do you not want to want me?". I blinked, and he was right infront of me starring into my eyes, right into my soul, I swear those eyes could see into every part of me if they tried.

"Of course I do, after all this time how can you not know how much I love you"  
For that split second, as those words sunk in I couldn't breathe, the whole world could have collapsed beneath me and I wouldn't have noticed, or cared.

"I wanted you, but not your body, or your smell, or your soul, I wanted your humanity"  
He looked disgusted at what he'd just said, even the thought seemed to kill him. I couldn't understand why he thought that was such a bad notion. It would mean I could be with him for the whole of both our lives, how ever long that may be. I reached up and put my hand on his face, I had to go on tiptoes as he towered above me.  
I crushed my lips to his and felt his body tense, then relax and let me sink into him as my actions said more than words ever could. It was ok. I knew there was a part of him that did and always would thirst for my blood, but also that he had no way to prevent those feelings. I trusted him completely, he wouldn't hurt me, even if he wasn't so convinced himself, I knew.

We pulled apart both slightly unnwillingly, for a moment we just stood in each others arms not wanting to move, both wishing that this moment wouldn't end.

He then picked me up in his arms with ease, and layed me on the bed, he pinned my wrists to the pillow as he knelt above me. All of a sudden all I could hear, feel and take in was the sound of his breathing so rythmic, so rugged, so intense.

"Kiss me" I tried to sound strong, demanding, but he was so close to me all I could muster was a hushed whisper.

He smiled at me and kissed my chest, moving his lips up he was on my neck, kissing and nibbling, it was almost unbearable. I just wanted to be with him, have him, but he was in control and he knew it. I had somehow lost all ability to be forceful, all I could do was lay there, this was what he did to me. There was nothing I could do, he teased and dragged out the action, until finally he reached my lips and softly I felt the pressure of his on mine.


End file.
